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1. Shop ahead! Last-minute shopping for all those people is not the best way to show Christmas spirit, especially as you shove that old lady out of the way to grab the last Tickle Me Elmo. As her cane comes down on top of your head, may the revelation of your own stupidity and procrastination help guide you in years to come!
2. Some assembly required. Be forewarned that this is a lie! Some … please, why didn’t they just tell you that you needed an engineering degree to put the piece of plastic junk together? Make sure you assemble whatever it is weeks ahead of time and hide it at someone else’s house!
3. If #2 is not followed, remember to stay calm. It will work out, and if not, blame it on Santa! Most people around the world would not interpret the cursing and foul language that spews from some of our mouths because we have leftover screws or the masterpiece we have recently assembled looks nothing like the picture on the box as a Christmas carol.
4. Use as a technique if #3 hasn’t worked: “The best way to spread Christmas cheer is singing loud for all to hear!” to quote the popular movie Elf. It is true. Try singing “Jingle Bells” or “Deck the Halls.” It is virtually impossible to sing Christmas carols and remain angry or ticked off. Maybe some of you need to sing these while assembling your children’s toys!
5. “I saw mommy kissing Santa Clause.” The holidays can be stressful, so take some time with that special someone. Instead of being upset at the disassembled mess that is your child’s future toy, have a cup of hot chocolate with that special someone and relax together!
6. Remember that this is one night during the year that your children will look like they are on crack! Threats and being frustrated at the strong-willed child, saying Santa is going to skip your house or that he or she is going to get nothing but coal doesn’t really work. Though that gift is considerably cheaper and sometimes tempting to give, it is better that you love your children to sleep, not beat them! Read them a story; snuggle with them until they drift off. If they are extremely strong-willed, set up a little guard duty between you and your wife. Make it a game.
7. Make a list and check it twice! Give your son or daughter a list of every good thing you see in him or her. Remind your child of how much you love his or her laugh or how proud you are of him or her. Write your child a letter filled with a few of the fond memories of the past year. When your child is older, this may well be his or her most prized Christmas gift!
8. Treasure the goofy tie; don’t hang yourself with it. Christmas is a time when you remember that “it’s not about you!” Those off-the-wall gifts, those dollar store gadgets that you know will not last more than one use, those honest-to-God ugliest-thing-you-ever-saw, wouldn’t-ever-wear-it, couldn’t-ever-use-it, one-of-kind, piece-of-junk presents are representations of your child’s heart. It may not be what you wanted, but it is what you are given, a small token of the love that your child has for you. Those presents represent a heart that is infinitely bigger but a pocketbook that is infinitely smaller than yours.
9. A full stomach or the football game is no excuse! After the sleepless night, the cursing and/or caroling (the choice is yours), the Christmas lunch or dinner approaches. As most dads are looking forward to the day off, the food, and the football game, do not forget the little one who is begging you to play with him or her. Spend time with your children during this time. Make an effort to make the day about family.
10. Through all the wrapping paper, the leftover turkey and dressing, with the tired muscles and weary bones from playing, ask yourself, “Why are you celebrating this day?” It is because of who you are that Christ was born. Because of His love for you, He allowed you the privilege of having a child. He did this so you could know how He feels on a perpetual basis.  A deep, rich satisfaction, joy, and heart overflowing with love are what He feels, and He is giving you the opportunity as a dad to feel it too. Ultimately, the greatest gift you can give your children is being their father, just like Christ giving Himself to the world gave you a heavenly Father! You … yes, you … are why Christ was born. Who you are is a child of God!

Blake Rackley, Psy.D., is an assistant professor of psychology at Emmanuel College.  Dr. Rackley also works at a private practice specializing in children and adolescents. He enjoys spending time with his lovely wife, Elizabeth, and his one-year-old boy, Jon Michael.

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